Moons and miracles.

Last night I was phoned at 10:30pm by a client to let me know her waters had broken but nothing was happening yet. I may have mentioned this earlier but this is always a hard thing to cope with. You’re not needed, but now you know you’re going to be needed - no doubt in the middle of the night - so then you are trying to get back to sleep while re-planning your day, calculating how much sleep you might get if you’re lucky and just generally thinking about what the woman’s birth might be like, what her unique needs might be and then you are instantly back in work mode. But I did manage to get back to sleep by about 11pm. Winning!

Then she phoned at 12:30 to say contractions were not established but that she was ready go to the hospital. Now you can’t really turn up at the hospital if you’re not in established labour, so I said I would come to her house instead to assess and make a plan. Five minutes later after I’ve dressed and was making my coffee she rings again - contractions still not established but she feels a lot of pressure and is leaving NOW! I think she was probably already in the car. So then I ring the hospital to let them know. I also give the very vague heads up that it will either be hours before a baby yet, or she will be turning up to birth in reception and they will need to have their birth pack ready because baby’s coming. Fast. I’m sure the charge midwife was well pleased I had added to her busy day - not. But that’s midwifery, full of unknowns and impossible to plan for.

Turns out the second option was the winner. As I walked in the door to the hospital room baby was just shooting out onto the bed into the staff midwifes hands. Not quite the reception floor, but born only three minutes after arrival, she had managed to walk the long corridor and clamber up on the bed in that time. I arrived in time to jump up to what we term the ‘head end’ and help her deal with the shock of the sudden arrival. I wish I could have taken a photo of her face - it was an amazing picture - the classic caricature of a surprised face, she had the huge eyes and round mouth while sporting a crying/laughing very relieved husband at her side. It was lovely.

A couple of minutes later as we were just getting everyone settled, the receptionist knocked on the door to say that the husband‘s car was still running outside with the doors open! You can just picture the poor man thinking he was going to have to catch a baby screetching to a halt, leaping out to help her inside, not even noticing he hadn’t turned the car off.

They were talking about the shock seeing that scene must have been for the security guard outside. But surely as a security guard watching someone arrive in full on labour is way better than dealing with abusive people, or just being plain bored for hours on end. He probably has some really good work stories to take home to his bubble.

So in the end I was there much longer after the baby was born than before hand. The three amazing midwives that were there when I arrived were gone to other jobs within five minutes once the immediate rush was over. Gee I wish I could work in threes all the time! It always takes me longer to get out of the hospital after a birth than a birthcentre or home - due to the the unbelievable amount of paperwork that is required. In an effort to make sure nothing vital is missed all information is now repeated on different forms. The rebel in me really struggles with that. It drives me insane that I have to write the same information in three places on a different type of form, as well as having to enter it on their computer system. And then my own computer as well so I can get paid! There are so many double ups and forms that you feel like all you’re doing is documenting - with your back to the woman because that’s how the room is designed - instead of being able to support her completely at that vital time. It’s supremely frustrating. I’m sure the staff would come and help with all the admin required if they weren’t so busy, But that’s the nature of midwifery at the moment - the workforce is so strapped there is never anyone spare.

So tonight’s super moon worked well for that woman. As I drive home now (talking into my phone) I could almost have no lights on it’s so bright. Usually a full moon (and especially a super moon) seems to have some sort of gravitational pull on babies and out they come, so hopefully I get home and get some sleep before it has its next affect.

I find talking/writing the blog on my way home really cathartic. My memory is uber bad. This way I get to remember the funny bits, reflect on what went right and wrong and how I reacted and then just let it all go. Aside from the next day of course when I have to decipher what Siri has written and try to remember what I actually meant! My thanks to all you guys for being my outlet. I love getting your comments back.

So I got back to bed at 5.30am, up for a wee twice, (stupid overnight coffee), asleep by 7am

7.30 - alarm goes - f*#*!

9.30 - phone goes, enquiry for a midwife

10.30 - phone goes, another enquiry for a midwife, much harder to be warm and friendly

11.00 friend comes to feed pig, lots of enthusiastic squeeling

11.18 Roofer turns up, lots of stomping above my head

11.25 husband rings to tell me said roofer coming 🙄. I hang up on him.

11.26. I give up and get up.